my family puts the nuts in the mixed can

I go to Thanksgiving at the 50 plus pothead relatives. The daughter and bf come in with the 7 week old baby. ( I didn't think the baby was very cute....even though I lied and said it was and then lied some more...) The baby's mother is given a joint by the grandmother and the mother goes outside to smoke it with bf. Baby's mother wonders why the baby doesn't want to nurse, but only likes a bottle. I googled later, and found pot smoking can make a baby NOT want to nurse. Look it up .
Basically T day was nice and my sister that doesn't like me was actually nice to me and we took a walk in the woods and she didn't try to push me off a cliff........so it was a good day in many ways. Good food too.

Now a few days later, I sit here fuming over more relative crap. This is about the son and the other grandmother , who is slipping in to la la land. The G-son has been begging her all summer for money. I find she gave him ALOT of money before she went south. I am livid.
And now I will try to tune this crazy bunch of by-blood-onlys , out of my mind.

coloring my hair w animals

I generally wait until I look like trailer trash (which I am close to anyway,living where I do) before I RE-color
my hair. I get the gray stuff going down the part up top and on the sides and I look quite
repulsive. Today, I decided to get the box of Golden Brown hair color and go at it. I am
dripping with this messy goop on my head and have to keep a paper towel w me at
all times to keep wiping away the color running down my face. While waiting I think..
aahhh I can write to Mom. I begin. Rody , young dog, aka pita, starts to whine behind me
at the door. The kittens want in. Then they want out. Then Rody doesn't want out. Then
the neighbor has her dogs out in the field behind me letting them run. My dogs go
bolistic watching. bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark ..run to other door to look out window ....bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark ..... jumping going crazy. I tell them
if they would behave and not run away, they TOO, could go run out in the field. It is not
digested ..it is bark bark bark bark bark.
FINALLY, I have rinsed the color out of my hair. The critters have all settled down.
I think I am going abandon ship soon. It used to be to get away from THE HUSBAND
now........well read above.......
Chow

Bass Ackwards

I have an ulcer and it hurts like hell tonight. I had a scope put down my gullet last week. The verdict was a chronic ulcer. I have had ulcers in the past. This time I have a doozie. I have two different meds to take.

I have globs of stress. This compounds my ulcer and it's antics. I was thinking tonight of ways to
eliminate the stress in my life. My mother cannot be neglected so that idea is out. I mean she IS my mother. My dogs drive me absolutely nuts. The old dog does not deserve my foot up his ass. Like I "said" he is old and quite stupid. The young dog is a royal pain. He is hyper and too much. I even gave him away once. The new owner let him run free in traffic. I took him back.
Young dog, is cute and funny...but he has his dark side. He is just terribly bad and annoying.
I am not good at training dogs and I think young dog is a dog that you would have to beat
over the head to train. I don't believe in beating dogs over the head.

So it comes down to my mother and two dogs...that equal STRESS. Now if I put my mother in a kennel and the dogs in a nursing home, I would probably be told I did something ass backwards.
But right now it all sounds like a good plan.

the reward of a long life~going nuts

My mother is in the beginning stages of alzheimers. I think she is way past stage one and her marbles are quickly slipping through the hour glass of sanity, to who am I? Where am I? Who are you?
I want my mother back. The one that knew how to cook, how to take showers and be clean, the one that created, and kept a spotless house.
The stress of helping her is a challenge. Taking her places wipes out my spark. After I leave her, it takes along time to relight my wick. I need sleep and that is what I am off to do. Two kittens now share my room. There is nothing more luscious than soft purring balls of love to calm a shook up soul. (anyone with fingernail on the chalkboard nerves needs a kitten )

Sadly, Mom realizes she is loony...to a degree. She hates being the way she is and often says It is hell to get old.
I have friends her age and they are of sharp mind and functioning normally. Why? What causes this horrible diease to creep into peoples minds and destroy them?

A man !? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I have found that my kittens poo smell like cheese whiz..only the kind that has sat around
in a vault for maybe 100 years with mold and crap on it. These guys love to shat. They
love to dig. They are totally adorable except for the elimation of turds. Since they are sharing
my bathroom , which connects to my bedroom, my eyes have been watering frequently.
I realize more and more , there will never be another man in my life. And honestly why
would I want one. Maybe to drive me to Barnes and Noble at night. (I freak at night
driving) I can't SEE. ) But I don't want to worry about kitty shit smell if a man is
in my bed.....

There was a time I wanted someone in my life so badly. I wanted someone to SAVE me from
my sad pathetic horrible sucky marriage. I later wanted just someone to adore me. I later
wanted someone to just hang out with. What I found , is most men my age cannot get it
up and have titties bigger than mine. I found that they can be controlling and they drive
too fast. Honestly , who needs that shit?

I live quietly, except for my asshole dogs barking, in a peaceful home. My messes are mine.
The hair in the tub is mine. The hair around the toilet is mine. The goobers in the sink
are mine. The milk is never run out unless I DID IT. The wet towels on the floor are from
me. I don't want a man. No way no how.

I am at an age where I have burned out from shaving and plucking and slathering on
moisterizer. I will walk alone happily, with my hairy legs and bushy eyebrows.

Oh how wonderful to break wind and burp and be myself.

The Pee Zone

In the wee hours of the night there seems to be alot of peeing going on. I get up..... dogs need out...dogs need in. Olivia the cat comes in. Of course, her Highness, cannot pee outside and goes
to her litterbox. Other kitty remains outside hunting. Dogs are now sleeping. Livers is curled up taking in the night.
I want to get back to this amazing dream I was having. It doesn't seem to happen after being up.
I wonder where the people go that were in my dream? Did they move over to the next plane? Another Twilight Zone ? Where is Rod when I need him?

later that day~~aka plot thickens

I am doing a blog bc I want to get moving on writing. An incentive.
4 people this past week said WRITE. They think I am funny.
Little do they know. I have my dark and creepy side. But I
am divorcing him soon........He is a good man. He totally sucked
at being a husband, though. He was too tight to buy my manuel.
He only wanted the cows and the 15 acres of land.

Should we all come with our own personal manuals? I need to go
post this on my fav message board and ask.

what I have learned in 3 hours~~

Reading emails from friends~they group them~they chew them up and spit them out as they continue to hit forward to all , dissecting each.

This morning is was about a lady being raped walking on RT..220. Next mass email was, don't use Pyrex. You
can get sick. I will not walk on 220 today or eat out of Pyrex. Life is cozy.